Chapter 3: Getting Creative

So, shockingly, I didn’t find a temporary boyfriend to solve my TV troubles. But then again, after I went home and deliberated the pros and cons of said temporary boyfriend, I really wasn’t that interested. Last week as I left the office I thought about my real priorities: seeing “Picasso, Baby” and finding somewhere to watch Shark Week. Since Friday, it’s been all about exploring my options. For the first time in the past two weeks, I don’t feel like the vast and diverse television world is making my life an upward battle.

It started on Friday night about 10:00 p.m. when I casually went to talk to the guy that lives above me. He’s a huge music person and doctor, so I figured he’d not only be watching the Jay Z video, but he’d also have premium cable. As my mother has told me on multiple occasions, I should really learn to never assume. Instead, I wound up talking to the doctor in his living room as he sat on the floor in his crocs in front of his 20-inch cable-free TV. (Definitely scratching him off the temporary boyfriend list).

Another guy friend told me he believed the video would be on WorldStarHipHop.com shortly after it aired, so after I was done talking to the doctor about 976 different diseases in LA County, I proceeded to go home and watch the video on my computer. Considering music videos have always been watched on computers, (Editor’s note: This is how we can tell Alexis is a Millennial. We non-Millennials, however, know that music videos did not used to be watched on computers because a. there were no computers on which to watch them and b. there was no Internet and c. there was definitely no video on that non-existent Internet.) I didn’t mind too much—and at least I got to see it almost in time with its release—but obviously seeing it on my HD TV would have been a much better experience.

My parents were in town on Sunday, so I tried to forget about Shark Week for the most part, especially since I knew I wouldn’t be able to watch it. But then Monday rolled around and as I started my weekly laundry, I skimmed through my Apple TV set-top navigation, deliberating whether to play music or watch Netflix. All of a sudden I stopped, and caught a glimpse of the SAME image I saw a week back on Brief, “It’s A Bad Week to Be a Seal.” My heart stopped and I swiveled the remote back to TV shows. I quickly navigated and skimmed through the text, unbelieving that I was actually seeing Shark Week content up for grabs on my Apple TV. Low and behold, it was there. Under Shark Week 2013 it said, “Buy Season Pass (HD) $20.99.”

WHAT? A season pass? How did I NOT know about this? Oh wait, I know exactly why I didn’t know about this. Because it was never marketed on the social media feeds of Discovery OR Shark Week and it certainly wasn’t a reply to any of my 40 Twitter panic tweets to both of those. I’ve had everyone from Gap to Club Monaco, JetBlue, Four Seasons, AT&T and the JW Marriott tweet me, but Shark Week? Not a chance.

Reluctantly, I bought the season pass for Shark Week. While I was excited to actually have the option to view without having cable, I was slightly annoyed I would be paying $20 for something I truly believe should just be offered online, not to mention paying for a “season pass” of Shark Week, where I haven’t been able to download each night’s content until 24 hours later! Being that I am constantly in a FOMO (note for non-Millennials: fear of missing out) state of mind, it’s pretty embarrassing tweeting about Megalodon when there’s already been tons of press talking about how it’s a sham and scripted. Pretty much ruins the whole experience.

Finally, last night a girlfriend texted me about watching the Bengals versus Falcons game at a bar down the street, and while it started at 5:00 p.m., I knew there was no way I’d make it out of work to watch.

So while I did get everything I wanted in the past week when it comes to TV, the biggest drawback now is convenience. In addition to my recent findings, I also managed to plug my TV into the wall last weekend and get basic cable, which includes ABC, NBC, Fox, Telemundo and The CW. I never realized it was this easy to get basic cable because I had never ever needed to set it up myself. With the basic free cable channels I’m now able to get my dose of the news, Kris Jenner’s new talk show (which I will never be able to watch because it is on at 3:00 p.m.) and TMZ (I had no idea Amanda Bynes was in a psych ward!). Talk about Fear of Missing Out…

Summer is always a little slower at work, but pretty soon I know I won’t be able to leave work with time to spare to catch a game. Unless I just want to read the scores online—which is sports hell for me—my only other option is recording the games and starting a little later. What kills me is not having the freedom to record and watch content on my own time. But for me and people in my age group, it’s about one thing and that is cost. Cable is not cheap and when you have Netflix, Hulu, Showtime and HBO, it all adds up. Living alone, you’re talking a trip to Europe each year.

Thankfully, I do have a roommate and we’ve discussed adding cable soon. I just wonder once I have it back, how will I make best use of my TV time? We all know I don’t have three hours a night to watch television. And so, like Carrie Bradshaw, I wondered: Is the convenience of cable worth the cost?

Read last week’s article Chapter Two: Desperately Seeking Premium Cable.

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